(no subject)

[sebastienne]

I have made a discovery of a culinary nature. I feel the need to share this with the world. You will need

- excess laziness
- a kettle
- a large mug or small bowl
- a packet of some kind of tacky noodle
- soy sauce
- peanut butter


To begin with, take the laziness, and look around your room with it. Realise that there is nothing in your room that you wish to have for dinner, and that the shops are simply Too Far Away. Next, find the packet of tacky noodles, but realise a) they need to be cooked in a kitchen, and the lodge where you need to sign the key out is Too Far Away and b) that you hate the flavour anyway.

Next, boil your kettle, and place the noodles in the mug or bowl. Throw away the nasty lo-fat thai sweet chilli flavouring that comes with them. When the kettle has boiled, fill your noodle receptacle and stir for a few minutes. Empty out the water and refill with boiling water, repeating until you find the noodles edible. Then drain them, add a splash of soy sauce and two large teaspoons of peanut butter. Stir well, and eat. Satay Supernoodles. Good god they're good. Good god am I lazy.

Comments

[sushi-radical.livejournal.com]

*grin*

The true staircase 14 cuisine!!!!

[half-of-monty.livejournal.com]

!!!!!!!!!!!!
That's exactly what I did all year in staircase 14!
!!!!!!!!!!!!
Well, to be precise, I didn't have any peanut butter. I used gloopy Chinese sweet chilli sauce. Lovely stuff, spicy and full of sugar energy, though I don't think I've been able to face the stuff since my finals. But the key thing for this staircase 14 recipe is to throw away whatever nasty cheap flavour has come with your nasty cheap noodles. Also I didn't bother replacing the water, I balanced a plate on top of the bowl to keep the water hotter.

You can pretend to be healty and getting lots of vitamins, if you put bits of brocoli and peppers in too. This depends on you liking them raw.

I'll post up the other great staircase 14 culinary discovery - how to boil an egg using only two mugs and a kettle - when I've had my own dinner. Do you like soft-boiled eggs?

Can I come round for quick cheap kitchenless dinner in January? I'm feeling all senimental!

Re: The true staircase 14 cuisine!!!!

[sebastienne.livejournal.com]

oh, i've read your boiled egg recipe before.. indeed, that was at least in part where i got the idea that i could cook the noodles without a hob! am glad to see that i am continuing a great tradition.

and certainly you are welcome any time for kitchenless dinner; i plan to have people in this room a lot, i think it will be lovely for entertaining and throwing water bombs at people on holywell street.

Re: The true staircase 14 cuisine!!!!

[sushi-radical.livejournal.com]

OI!!!!

I was the one suggested the hotwater in mug to you!

*pouts*

Not often I have a good idea, have to keep an eye on the one's I do have...

Re: The true staircase 14 cuisine!!!!

[sebastienne.livejournal.com]

oh, i freely admit that you suggested the noodles-in-a-mug when i was bitching about hunger & laziness... note how i say "at least in part where i got the idea"! but had it not been for previous exposure to half_of_monty's boiled egg recipe, i would have been much more cynical about it working, and perhaps not have risked wasting the noodles by trying it.

your contribution to the recipe is greatly noted and appreciated, my love.

Re: The true staircase 14 cuisine!!!!

[sushi-radical.livejournal.com]

*happy dances*

Re: The true staircase 14 cuisine!!!!

[pozorvlak.livejournal.com]

Why do you need two mugs?

1) open lid of kettle
2) put egg in kettle
3) turn on kettle (leaving lid open)
4) when kettle has boiled for long enough to cook egg, pour out water, and carefully extract egg from kettle
5) eat egg.

You have to be careful not to crack the egg, though, or you'll get strings of egg all through your kettle.

The trick with ramen is to buy them from Chinese supermarkets, and preferably to get ones with Chinese or Vietnamese labels. Cheaper, and you get flavours that are actually nice.

Re: The true staircase 14 cuisine!!!!

[half-of-monty.livejournal.com]

Have you actually ever done this? I don't believe you.

3a) Stand with finger on button of kettle as otherwise it will turn off
3b) Peer through clouds of steam which fill room
3c) As steam clears, peer into kettle. See that egg has been sitting on the filament and something horrid has happenned, probably involving the egg inevitably cracking and spilling innards directly onto the filament.
3d) That would explain the smell of burning, then
3e) Cool kettle down
3f) Try to clean it.

My method, on the other hand, works perfectly. But I'm not typing it up right now cause I did before and have it saved somewhere; it's a slightly involved explanation though implementing it is simple enough.

Re: The true staircase 14 cuisine!!!!

[pozorvlak.livejournal.com]

Yes, I have done this, though not for several years - I've lived somewhere with a kitchen since my second year. The eggs do crack sometimes, but generally my success rate was quite good. You don't need to hold your finger on the button, because the lid's open so the steam pressure is never enough to turn the kettle off. Yes, you do get some steam, but not much more than you would cooking an egg in a saucepan. And you're daft if you're not doing this by a window, anyway. Even if the egg cracks, yea, even all over the filament, the egg will not burn and stick to the filament, for it is under water. Cleaning a broken egg is a bit tricky (you have to fish bits out from under the filament), but not that bad. The major downside of the egg cracking is that it will taste horrid when you eat it.

Re: The true staircase 14 cuisine!!!!

[pozorvlak.livejournal.com]

So incensed was I by your impugnation of my honesty, that I cooked an egg for breakfast in a kettle this morning, and moblogged (http://moblog.co.uk/view.php?id=193917) it (http://moblog.co.uk/view.php?id=193918). None of the problems you outlined occurred (apart from, arguably, the steam, but that collected at the ceiling and was dealt with by the extractor fan). In fact, the egg didn't stay on the filament for long, as it was held up by the bubbles of air in the water. No kettle-cleaning was required.

And the egg tasted lovely.

Re: The true staircase 14 cuisine!!!!

[half-of-monty.livejournal.com]

Well done :-) I bow down to you egg in-in-kettle-boiling skills.

[Mind you, the fact that there was an extractor fan to remove the steam suggests you were in a kitchen at the time. The point of staircase 14 cuisine is that there isn't a kitchen. And, in my room at least, no suitably placed windows. I did actually also briefly try this method in my old room, but the steam was unbearable so I gave up after a minute and developed my two mug technique to finish cooking the egg.]

Re: The true staircase 14 cuisine!!!!

[pozorvlak.livejournal.com]

Ah. If you have neither extractor fan nor window, then you might well have to resort to more complex methods. But if you don't have a window, I think your problems may be greater than a mere lack of boiled eggs.

[stronglight.livejournal.com]

If you have any to hand, add a little fruit juice to dilute the sauce and some chili and garlic (the squidgy tubes of chili and garlic are a godsend to the lazy but sadly they are not vegan...:-() and a little milk/cream/coconut milk and you have a genuine satay sauce. Tasty good.

[sebastienne.livejournal.com]

where would one go about getting a squidgy tube of chilli & garlic? are they similar to tomato purée, garlic purée, things like that? i am excited by my ability to make satay in my room, and all of these sound like yummy things to add - i'd probably mix them into the peanut butter, make a nice sauce, before adding to the noodles, in order to get away from the "i'm eating noodles with lumps of peanut butter" feeling.

[ex-leighwoos982.livejournal.com]

Substitue any prepacketed flavouring for soy sauce and garlic.

I once lived with two army cadets who's barracks had radiators so fiendishly and unadjustably hot that their only redeeming feature was the ability to boil ramen in mess tins.

[spidrak.livejournal.com]

WHY did I never figure that out! It's brilliant!

I love satay sauce. I have lived in without a kitchen. I always have peanut butter.

For services to studentkind I herby award you...

um...

some noodles! (to be redeemed at Hellfire for dinner, once I'm back in Oxford)

[sebastiality.livejournal.com]

If you have an iron you can make toast. That's if you don't mind crums in your creases.

[lemuel-condy.livejournal.com]

Taken from Benny and Joon...

[sebastienne.livejournal.com]

ah, that was cheese toasties, an entirely different and more johnny-depp-related snackfood.

why was that film called "benny and joon", when it was all about sam and joon? the whole sub-plot with the brother and the garage could just disappear, in fact, i tend not to watch the first half hour of what would, actually, be a godawful film if it weren't for mister depp...

[lemuel-condy.livejournal.com]

They still involved toasting with an iron, the filling or lack thereof is immaterial.

The plot wouldn't really work without Benny, though. I agree that the sub-plot with him and that waitress(?) who I forget the name of could be removed, but you need him to almost hand Joon over to Sam.
Benny is more of a protagonist than Sam. You don't really see things from Sam's point of you. The film follows the home, work and love lives of Benny and Joon, Sam's role could almost be equated to the waitress's.

[kittenwidawhip.livejournal.com]

I'm taking that tip and running with it !
i love satay - and i have a feeling io'll be needig to eat dirt cheep when i get to london!!!

THANKs! :)