(no subject)

[sebastienne]

It's my last day at work today. Well, actually, I'm employed and they're paying me until the end of August; but not taking a holiday for eleven months has its advantages, and this five-week paid break is one of them.

I am going to miss conversations with co-workers (library staff - they are at right-angles to "reality" and I love them for it), the readers that know me and seek me out when they have problems, and (guilty pleasure) switching off the lights in the Graduate Study Rooms one by one, starting with the furthest away and ending with the closest, so I could pretend I was in a sci-fi corridor and the unknown alien presence was on its way.

And soon pridehouse will be at an end - by Thursday noon, the place needs to be empty and spotless. I got my full deposit back on the Pansexual House of Love and plan to repeat this pattern with the judicious application of elbow grease and bleach-based cleaning products.

An ending, and a beginning. I still don't have a new job but I live in hope. Always, and about everything, I live in hope. Sometimes I think about my career, about information management, about making democracy more effective through better informing the populace. Sometimes I know that the only way to pursue these dreams will be to move to London. That I'll stagnate as long as I cling on to this place and all the self-actualisation it has allowed me. I should take that wonderful rock-solid core of me-ness, cherish it, and move on to the next stage. But on the roofs of Oxford, I know: this place has trapped me with freedom, and I will not get away so easily.

Comments

[ex-leighwoos982.livejournal.com]

Leave for London. You are too big and brilliant for Oxford now.

[sebastienne.livejournal.com]

Not yet. But perhaps at the end of next year. *wistful sigh*

[ex-leighwoos982.livejournal.com]

Oxford has dreaming spires. That should give you a good perspective to plan your escape route from. Where will you live after the Pridehouse?

did you ever meet Purple Monkey?

[chiasmata]

The Mousehole is looking forward to having you!

(Btw, I will have a tenancy application form for you by the end of the day - shall I pop it through your door?)

[sebastienne.livejournal.com]

That sounds great - thanks!

[the-whybird.livejournal.com]

So long pridehouse! I'll miss you!

[apotropaios.livejournal.com]

This (last paragraph, especially) = massively more eloquent version of what I wanted to say a few days back :)

[deathbyshinies.livejournal.com]

You are too big and brilliant for Oxford now.

On behalf of everyone who lives and works here, thanks bucketloads, mate.

If and when sebastienne feels like the time is right for her to go to London, then it is. If she feels like staying in Oxford is what she wants to do for now, or for a little while, or forever, then that's great too. If she wants to make her career somewhere else entirely, again, rinse and repeat. She will be just as brilliant wherever she is, and that's very brilliant indeed - but to my mind, there's no such thing as being 'too _____' for this place or that; there's only whether or not it's the right place for you. And only sebastienne can be the judge of that.

[ex-leighwoos982.livejournal.com]

Well I'm sorry I caused you offense. I was giving my opinoin. It was hardly meant as a personal attack on each and every denizen of the city. I was only giving my opinion in response to the worry of stagnating mentioned in the post. If sebastienne does not want those opinions she can block me from commenting through the manage comment setting page or LJconsole.